Sunday Zugzwang: Dealing with Trolls

This is something I’ve thought about doing for quite some time, and I wanted to try it out. I will write a smaller blurb on something which I have found to be of interest the past week. Without further ado, let’s go!

                I knew that I would get some blow-back from my previous Polemic, so I wasn’t too concerned with being confronted by those with opposing viewpoints. A gentleman, who will not be named, told me that I was a “douchecanoe”. Now, before I continue, I do have a question: what on Earth is a “douchecanoe”? Seriously, I will not only send the person who can give me a definition of this term a free signed copy of my next book, but I will dedicate it to them! Now, I could tell already that this person didn’t want to have a discussion. I knew that he just wanted to pick a fight and be the quid essential Troll. However, being one of those people who like to poke the bear, I replied that I had done the research and was welcome to hear how I had written something incorrectly or had improperly cited something. Of course, I was accused of not only plagiarism but also not making the attempt to look at both sides with as little bias as I could. Of course, this gentleman apparently focused more on reading the ending before taking into account that this Polemic took me WEEKS to write, and my ending changed three times during that time. I suppose that he thought that I just bulldozed through it in one afternoon.

                I’m not sure how Christian this concept is, but I enjoy causing these people to have a mild aneurism. I do enjoy the fact Trolls on the Internet would rather have you rage back at them rather than having a discussion on the topic at hand. This type of people, Trolls, have only two ways to argue:

If They’re Right:

·         Focus on the topic

·         Won’t let you waver from the topic

·         Won’t let you bring up any topic related to the original topic

·         Keep drilling until you either apologize or concede that they are right

If They Can’t Prove They’re Right:

·         Whine

·         Bring up your failures

·         Openly insult you

·         Call you a: Racist, Sexist, Bigot, Misogynist, Religious Zealot, Flat-Earther, Science-Denier, or a combination of the previous titles

Now, this attempt is to bait you to insult them. If you do, then they will go back to how they argue if they’re right.

                I know that I shouldn’t poke fun at such people, so usually I don’t even give them my time of day. However, if you have had some issues with Trolls, there’s a couple of things you can do in order to avoid being bogged down by such people:

1.       WAIT

Too often, especially in the modern era where we have twenty-four-hour access to social media, we have the impulse to react to people immediately. My suggestion is to wait, at the very least, five minutes before making the decision to give a rebuttal. Your decision on whether or not it is worth your time to answer this person will determine what you do next.

2.       Ignore

Believe it or not, you have the option not to respond. Sometimes the best answer to these people is no answer. If you don’t believe that your answer will lead to a productive discussion or will educate that person on a topic, one for which they may not be familiar with, then don’t reply. Sometimes it is not worth the mental fortitude to even give this person the time of day. This may sound cruel, but it’s the truth.

3.       Kindness

What they are looking for is you to go off the rails and say something hurtful or offensive. Most of the time, this will take the wind out of their sails.

4.       Educate

Let me be clear about this one: only take this course if you are confident that you are knowledgeable enough to offer an insight. If you don’t feel confident enough to do so, simply ask them what is wrong with your statement on an issue. If you are indeed incorrect, thank them for educating them and move on. Most of the time, however, you will find that they will try to bait you if they cannot offer a rebuttal.

5.       Stand Your Ground

If you feel that you are right, you have every right to state the reasons you are correct. State only the facts which will back your claim, leaving them nothing to twist into hurtful accusations.

6.       Limit Your Response to Only Once per Troll

This one is probably the hardest one to do. Social media is a game of Zugzwang, which is a Chess term meaning that each move is dependent on the other. However, by not moving and knocking the board off the table, you have made the decision to end the conversation altogether. Now if they choose to continue the conversation, they are appointing the title of “douchecanoe” onto themselves.

I won’t lie, the last one is the hardest one for me to do. About ninety-nine percent of the time, I don’t respond to any of them. My problem is when I am bored and am curious just how far they will take the conversation down into the middle school level of argument, trying to use all of the “bad words” you just learned about. I hope that I will be able to lessen the amount of time I respond to these people and I hope that you will, too. Thanks for reading, and have a blessed week!